Mike’s Prattle



Posted by Mike on October 24, 2012

One of the most profound parts of the spiritual journey is the idea that when we start we have spent most of our lives relying on our logic, instinctive and feeling capacities for everything we do. In the kabbalah all these parts of the lower self are captured in the sephiroth we work through and we spend a lot of time purifying and cleansing these areas, bringing shadowy stuff up to light and then transforming these things.

However, above these sephirah are the divine reaches and we often try to understand these through the lower senses and fail every time out. When we start on a path like the Golden Dawn, we understand these things as theories, but as we work through it the theories become personal experiences. The experience of these spheres above Malkuth, Yesod, Hod and Tiphareth is beyond everything we can think, feel or say about them and we have to resort to symbolism and metaphors in order to approach the “whatever this is,” especially as the true approach is personal and experiential and in many ways the journey itself.

As one tackles a system like this one gradually begins to approach Tiphareth. In the beginning one’s experience of these upper reaches may come as flashes in dreams or meditations, small and often significant experiences. But after years on the road one’s awareness of this ineffable state begins to grow and one cannot avoid the power and ramifications of what it is. The thing is, the tools our ego has provided us to approach this aren’t enough. When you’ve spent most of your life counting on one’s sense of being rational, to have the presence of something Irrational begin to have a serious effect on your life, you realize the tools you’ve used your whole life just aren’t enough anymore.

This can be a terrifying experience, particularly so for those who work on their own. The encroachment of divinity into one’s life will eventually shatter one’s logical and emotional certainty and most of the time we have to hope the powers will bring us through these traumatic phases in life. Most initiates are usually under the wing of a teacher and it seriously cannot be stressed enough how important it is to have someone there who can be a pillar of strength and help ground you when you start to walk uncharted territory past the gates of Netzach. In fact one of the major failings of self initiation is that it may very well be completely impossible to cross the veil of Paroketh without the type of grounding I mention above. On the other hand if one has worked up to this point and are sincere, the Universe will provide. I’ve found “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear” to have been true on several occasions and never more so than it is now. A good teacher will have experienced this transition him/herself and can act as a guide through the confusion and heartbreak.

I’ve personally experienced the difficulty of this via unconscious emotional trauma, almost to the point where I was at wit’s end with it. I honestly thought after a couple years of these things coming out of left field when I least expected it (only to be completely fine in an hour) that I’d be living with it the rest of my life. And then one of my teachers taught me a small and incredibly simple technique to manage this. It has changed absolutely everything and I’m starting to feel like the work is really taking off now. It’s a bit early to say why and how, but I’m feeling incredibly grateful and almost mesmerized by the “whatever it is” I’m gradually approaching.


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